Today began the same as any other Friday; I woke up, got my child ready for school, motivated myself to go to work, decided to stay home and laid back down. Luckily, I have a mother that takes her Grandmotherly duties seriously because Mama Lola took Dezi to school and I got it back to bed. However, I was still restless. Ever feel like there’s something you should be doing, but you can’t quite place it? Then it hit me, "dude, you haven’t spoken to Shay in AGES!" So, I called my girl Shayla. Shayla is a sweetheart; purely genuine and kind by nature. Still not sure what she sees in a character like myself, but hey, I guess opposites really do attract.Anyhoo, I called her and our conversation was bittersweet.
She told me that she just found out that she’s gonna be a mommy, but that the father of her child was killed in a car crash last Saturday. I felt sadness and guilt as I’ve had my phone off and on for the past week and when someone truly needed me, I was unavailable. She went on to tell me about this person who, in her mind’s eye, was the model of what a man should be; kind, generous, responsible, educated, compassionate and very hard working. She told me how her life was so drastically changed by his very presence for the short amount of time that she knew him. And through this conversation, she didn’t break once. As I listened in amazement at her strength I developed a kind of admiration for my friend.
Instinctively, I began to apply that situation to myself; how would I handle something like that? To have someone make such a major impact on my life only to have them taken prematurely? It gave me a new outlook on life and those that I love the most. You hear people say, "life is too short" all the time, but how often do you stop and show your appreciation for those that you love? If they weren’t here tomorrow, would you feel in your heart that you’ve said and done everything in your power to let them know how much you care?
We all have those moments when we aren’t getting along with a friend or significant other, but you must, must, MUST always let it be known that although you’re pissed at the moment, you still love them. Most of us are at an age where pride isn’t everything in the world. Sade said, "love is stronger than pride", and if you can honestly and truly say that you love someone and need them in your life, then what holds us back from giving in completely and admitting when we’re wrong? It’s that kind of pride and defiance that turns to guilt and eats our asses alive when someone close to us passes away.I say this because I care. I’ve lost many people, both friends and close family members, within these past few years and I can honestly say that to every single last one, my last words were "I love you". I didn’t care what was going on between us, I made sure I ended it on that note.
As stubborn as I may be at times, I know from experience (i.e., my Grandpa, but that’s for another conversation) that you aren’t always given a second chance. From this experience, I’ve challenged myself to continue to take things lightly. I’ll learn not to sweat the small stuff when it comes to friends and family. Lord knows I’m quite the firecracker when I’m mad, but all the time I spend arguing could be spent laughing. Most importantly, I’ll love, cherish and appreciate those closest to me while they’re HERE so that when they’re gone, I won’t feel cheated. I challenge everyone to just call those that mean the most to you and let them know you love them. If you can, try to make a habit of it.My heart goes out to Shayla, her family and the family of Jikee.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment